Sources leaked: center of the universe revealed to be an extremely arrogant "White Hole".
A self professed expert in everything universal and the "supremest of all supremacy" - The center of the universe has a reflectful aura, quite literally, and as the only known "White Hole" in the universe, very little is known about it scientifically.
"All we know about this astronomical anomaly is that it is extremely reflective" says Dr. S Jedderwidjin, head of Astrological Studies, Cal San Bernadino. "The best we can say is, that instead of absorbing masses and light surrounding it, it's completely expelled".
The Center of the universe was not readily available for comment, however, did release this statement:
"Yep, that's me alright, reflecting light and whatnot around. You see, the universe itself is not as big as these puny scientists think, frankly it's rather small. I'd say 3/4ths the size they speculate, that's what I find so humorous. I am so friggin' reflective, in fact, that the reflections of reflections within themselves seem to span for lightyears. Those aren't other solar systems that your looking at out there, it's just you, reflecting back at yourself about a bazillion times. One thing though, there's an end to it alright, an end that begins with me. It all freaking begins and ends with me ... I'm the center of the damn universe!"
This is a loose translation however, this language is so complex that it sounds roughly like a Sara Brightman song, only with lyrics and musical notes that you would not understand.
It's clearly as though it exists on a different plane.
A baffled Dr. Jedderwidjin states: "We plan on learning as much as we can about this [White] Hole in due time, the only problem is that it's so difficult to work with." He adds - "We liken it to a cross between an inverted black hole, Charlie Sheen and Mel Gibson, only without the unpredictable violence".
Until we understand more about this Great White Astrological Hole, briefly known as the 'Great White A. Hole Expandus', we can just look to the stars and dream a hope - hope and dream of a greater understanding.
A self professed expert in everything universal and the "supremest of all supremacy" - The center of the universe has a reflectful aura, quite literally, and as the only known "White Hole" in the universe, very little is known about it scientifically.
"All we know about this astronomical anomaly is that it is extremely reflective" says Dr. S Jedderwidjin, head of Astrological Studies, Cal San Bernadino. "The best we can say is, that instead of absorbing masses and light surrounding it, it's completely expelled".
The Center of the universe was not readily available for comment, however, did release this statement:
"Yep, that's me alright, reflecting light and whatnot around. You see, the universe itself is not as big as these puny scientists think, frankly it's rather small. I'd say 3/4ths the size they speculate, that's what I find so humorous. I am so friggin' reflective, in fact, that the reflections of reflections within themselves seem to span for lightyears. Those aren't other solar systems that your looking at out there, it's just you, reflecting back at yourself about a bazillion times. One thing though, there's an end to it alright, an end that begins with me. It all freaking begins and ends with me ... I'm the center of the damn universe!"
This is a loose translation however, this language is so complex that it sounds roughly like a Sara Brightman song, only with lyrics and musical notes that you would not understand.
It's clearly as though it exists on a different plane.
A baffled Dr. Jedderwidjin states: "We plan on learning as much as we can about this [White] Hole in due time, the only problem is that it's so difficult to work with." He adds - "We liken it to a cross between an inverted black hole, Charlie Sheen and Mel Gibson, only without the unpredictable violence".
Until we understand more about this Great White Astrological Hole, briefly known as the 'Great White A. Hole Expandus', we can just look to the stars and dream a hope - hope and dream of a greater understanding.
No comments:
Post a Comment