Theory of a Straight Man

The Supreme Court just ruled in favor of same sex marriage, making it a right for all - possibly the most controversial and impactful rulings of a generation. Love is love, right? I say yes. Who is to say who can get married to whom? Not I, and now, not our legal system.. Kudos USA.

Here's my quandary.

People like to belong to a cause, it gives them purpose. What better cause than same sex marriage for the LGBT community. Makes sense, right? Of course it does.

That cause is officially gone, hopefully forever - but that raises a thought…. And…….

My question is:

How many gays and lesbians actually 'want' to get married and how many partners say they 'want' to get married to be a part of the cause?

My theory is not all want to be married and the cause is now officially gone.

There may be a chance that this ruling is detrimental to many relationships by the simple fact that not everyone in a relationship wants to get married. This doubles itself to the many marriages that may happen out of impulse, this is America after all, the land of impulsiveness.

OK.

#1 quandary: how many relationships will now officially end because they were married to the idea of being married, but one partner may not actually want to be or get married in the first place? We all have used the bullshit excuse of: "I'd like to do that, but we can't" because of any myriad of reasons. Rules, laws, cost, impracticality…. These 'cop outs' get us out of a jam with our partners and friends… that protection is no longer there. People who really don't want to be married in the first place will be officially exposed, creating some potentially awkward or difficult situations.

Uh oh.

Perhaps a mass break up, or annulments are bleakly inherent in the future.

#2 quandary: impulsive marriages. This is the one that conservative talk show hosts are going to be keeping their eye on. They'll be quoting statistics and dragging the bottom for proof that they were right all along about traditional marriage being between a man and a woman. I'm not spinning this as a conservative or liberal thing, since I am neither, but…….

What is traditional marriage? Marriage is much different now than it was in the 50's, let alone to when Jesus or Moses were wondering around.

We are evolving as a species, even though the earth is 6,000 years old, and this is another step in our wacky evolution on a planet that will be around for much longer than we will be here….

So let's roll with it….

But, I am concerned for the future of some people's relationship's….

I hope I'm wrong.

Congratulations America, you grew up a little bit.

Cee Lo Green - F**k you!

Mr. Green, as you so eloquently stated in your widely successful hit single, I offer a sincere fuck you! You were given what many artists would consider a great honor, performing the interlude to the traditional "dropping if the crystal ball."  Instead you extended your arm with a fully, might I add chubby, middle finger. Not only butchering one of the greatest and most recognizable songs of a generation but, oh yeah, changing four integral lyrics how you saw fit. Shame on you Sir. You are a freaking artist yourself, have you no shame? Not only did you disrupt the entire meaning of the song, you stepped all over John Lennons legacy by your rewriting Imagine. Your intentions and insertion of "all religion is true" is not only a slap in the face but a forced injection on an inappropriate platform.  I give you your rights and freedoms of speech and religion, but how about after your performance? Imagine is not your song to edit how you see fit. 

I understand that you went on twitter with a "I don't understand what the big deal is" tweet (nice apology by the way).  Well, if you don't understand what the big deal is then you are clearly the most self absorbed, self serving asshole on the face of this planet. You mock the very industry you represented, the property you purposely defaced was not yours to begin with.  Again I echo my earlier statement: Mr. Cee Lo Green, fuck you!